Resolutions Anyone?

Photo Credit: Pixabay.com

Do you find resolutions confounding? Do you dislike making them because you know you will break them? Do you think you often make them when you are fervent and dedicated to an issue or concern and you’re afraid if you make more resolutions based on these concerns, you’ll just toss them into the detritus of the year’s collected garbage? Like old shoes, resolutions often meet their fate in the trash heap.

But sometimes you make a few resolutions that stick. Wow! Good feeling you think. I once received about 120 free birthday cards from a drugstore going out of business. At the time, we had exactly 120 sisters in the community so on New Year’s Eve I resolved to send each one a card for her birthday. I put together a calendar with the dates each month that someone would get a card. Many sisters did not have family to remember their birthdays. I’m happy to say that I fulfilled that resolution and actually found it to be a lot of fun. I can’t say I was successful with other resolutions although some, like the Seven Habits of Highly Successful People, Stephen Covey’s blockbuster of 30 years ago inspired me for several years to make good resolutions and some life changes. I had read the book entirely one New Year’s Day and started to practice it the very next day.

Even though the thought of resolutions is hackneyed to most of us and wearisome in the effort to remember them throughout the year, let alone practice them, I encourage you to make them. But make only a few. Since the process takes some reflection, I suggest an easy method to begin. 

First, take an inventory of your spiritual life. Brief one. Where is there a weakness you can improve on for better spiritual health? Attend Mass more regularly? Add a time of day when you can pray silently in a space that will foster it? Avoid talking ill of others? Pick from your list one or two things you can do. 

Second, examine your progress each night before bed. Use the method St. Ignatius of Loyola called the Examine in which you recall the positive things you have done with this resolution during this particular day.

You always have to make a renewed effort to keep the resolution fresh and try to understand the reason ‘why’ you made it in the first place. For instance, let’s say your marriage is getting dull or even strained. A resolution might be to see a marriage counselor and then remind yourself to apply his or her advice every day. Or, perhaps you should see a friend or family member you have had problems with; a resolution to make the first call is all that is needed.

Whatever you resolve to do, you will be much happier making an effort daily to keep trying to live that resolution. Maybe you decide you need a quiet retreat to settle some thoughts or think through some deeply challenging questions. You are ready for a time of peace at a retreat house. These venues of spiritual comfort will invite you to stay for a while and if you wish, accept the counseling of a spiritual director on staff who can guide you in your pursuit of direction. I have witnessed this from many people who had come to our Jesuit Retreat Center looking for spiritual peace and leaving unburdened and committed to follow through on their resolutions.

In his marvelous new book, Come Forth, James Martin, S.J. analyzes the radical importance of the raising of Lazarus in the Christian faith. Two commands are given by Jesus to the people witnessing this miracle, “Loosen him,” and “let him go.” Jesus is inviting the crowd to participate in the miracle. In fact, Jesus is strongly issuing commands. It is a powerful story of what you and I need to do as Christians; we need to unbind ourselves from what keeps us from being fully invested in faith and we need to unbind others who are caught in webs of hatred or addiction or anger and fear. If a relationship is dead, raise it up. If a person is held by the spell of addiction or personal loss or separation, they need to be ‘unbound.’ The result, says Martin, is freedom for the individual who had been bound and dead to life. He points out that the final words in the story translated from the classical Greek is “let him go free.” Fr. Martin relates that Jacob Epstein, a Jewish sculptor created a piece, now in the University of Oxford Museum, of Lazarus being raised. It is a stunning piece of the actions of Lazarus being untangled, loosened by the bandages, bonds, holding him. This story belongs to all faiths as Epstein might suggest, for the need to unbind, to loosen, to become free.   

As I see it, even the smallest, easiest resolution one makes is an effort to unbind something in the soul. Resolving to send birthday cards to friends is an action to let people know they are not forgotten. By doing this, one strengthens one’s own virtue of kindness and the bond of friendship. Resolving not to speak ill of someone you may not like, makes you a kinder person and perhaps more understanding of the other. Resolving to make a retreat in order to find direction and peace in your life, unbinds the initial fear you may have of facing deep, personal problems in your soul or it may simply be a way of adding more excitement and joy to your life. You can find retreat centers simply by Googling the subject.

For this week, read and reflect on the story of the raising of Lazarus as told in John 11:1-44. There is so much to this story theologically that entire books have been written on it and a great number of scholarly journal articles. I find Fr. Martin’s book exceedingly good for its clarity and down-to-earth explanations. Place yourself in the biblical story as you read it. In fact, read it several times and each time choose a different character providing a different perspective on what is happening.

And then reflect on the few resolutions you have written down to practice this year. Place these resolutions where you can be reminded of them during the day. I always hang mine from my office desk lamp since I work there every day. Most important: Make the resolutions!!!

Happy New Year to each of my readers and my Anonymous Angels. I will pray for you during my New Year’s Eve prayer time—as the moon centers above me, just outside our chapel window—and makes me think of you.